So I was looking through my notebooks and I found a note I wrote to myself about a month ago. I literally wrote it in the dark.
"Why do I keep doing this? Pursuing something I can’t catch. I don’t want to play. I don’t want to sing. My song is stolen from me. There’s no music in anything. I’m fading…my shine. This is not right. I’m writing in the dark, feeling so alone, so lost. How did I get here? What am I doing this for? Read this and remember how you feel right now. My head and my heart are waging a war. I know what I ought to do but it’s so hard because it’s not whay I want to do. All evidence is pointing to the exit…. time to save yourself or go up in flames. Here, I can’t sleep but, everywhere else, I can’t stay awake. I’d rather dream than live out my mistakes. I keep hurting myself. I need to escape."